Episode 70: Raising Responsible Adults with Future Focused Parenting
/In my community, I get a lot of questions like,
How can we raise kids that will become responsible adults without forcing them to do the tasks they need to?
How do we teach kids to be responsible without using punishments or rewards?
When getting these questions, I feel so in awe of you, because it means that you are brave in reaching out and asking for help, which takes a lot of strength! And I feel so honored that you trust me to give you the support you need. I want to just make sure you know you can always email me or message me with your questions! I use them to inform the guests and topics I choose for the podcast, and you never know, I may already have a video on my Facebook page (there are a LOT, have you checked it out?) or episode answering your exact question!
Ok, so now back to the question of the day: How do we raise responsible adults? I know that for many of you, with your eye on the "long game" that this is one of you goals. You want to raise kind, good humans who know how to take care of themselves and those they love. Who know how to work hard, solve problems with creativity, & have successful lives. And "responsibility" often is a big part of that!
And so, in this episode, we are joined by Deana and Kira of the Future Focused Parenting, the groundbreaking parenting philosophy that starts with the end in mind, encouraging families to make intentional parenting choices. As a child educator and a doula, Deana helps families prepare for the transition of becoming parents and everything that comes afterward. Together with Kira, a parent coach, they co-host the Raising Adults Podcast and discuss topics related to parenting with a long-range view and prepare families to thrive in their parenting journey.
Deana and Kira will help us answer those questions so that we can learn to raise responsible adults not just in doing house chores but also in decision-making.
Here is a summary of our discussion:
What it means to raise responsible adults
When to start teaching kids to be responsible
Giving privileges alongside responsibilities
How to collaborate with your kids
What are the pitfalls in raising responsible adults
If you want to get connected with Deana and Kira, follow them on Instagram @futurefocusedparenting and visit their website www.futurefocusedparenting.com. They are also on Facebook. So be sure to follow their page @futurefocusedparenting.
Get their 12-month Character Trait Freebie where each month you will get information on different character trait like emotional intelligence, wisdom, kindness, activities that you can do with your kids, and books to teach about these character traits.
TRANSCRIPT
Parenting is often lived in the extremes. It's either great joy or chaotic, overwhelmed. In one moment, you're nailing it and the next you're losing your cool. I want to help you find your way to the messy middle, to a place of balance. You see balance is a verb, not a state of being. It is a thing you do. Not a thing you are. It is an action, a process, a series of micro corrections that you make each and every day to keep yourself feeling centered. We are never truly balanced. We are engaged in the process of balancing.
Hello, I'm Dr. Laura Froyen and this is The Balanced Parent Podcast where overwhelmed, stressed out and disconnected parents go to find tools, mindset shifts and practices to help them stop yelling at the people they love and start connecting on a deeper level. All delivered with heaping doses of grace and compassion. Join me in conversations that will help you get clear on your goals and values and start showing up in your parenting, your relationships, your life with openhearted authenticity and balance. Let's go!
Laura: Hello everybody, this is Dr. Laura Froyen in and on this episode of the balanced parent podcast, we're going to be looking ahead, looking into the future a little bit, and talking about how to raise responsible adults and I'm so excited to have this conversation with my two guests, Kira and Deana, a future focus parenting and the raising adults podcast. Deana and Cara, thank you for being here with me. I'm so excited for this conversation. Why don't you introduce yourselves and tell us a little bit more about who you are and what you do?
Deana: Sure. Well my name is Deana Thayer and I'm one half of future-focused parenting with Kira and I came into this parenting work via the birth world. So I started off as a childbirth educator and a doula and I was helping families prepare for that transition of becoming parents and started to not sit well with me that I wasn't helping them for everything that comes afterwards. And so I was very grateful to meet Kira along the way. Actually, Kira was my very first twin birth as a doula and now I have the pleasure of working with her and doing the podcast alongside her, and helping families for everything that comes after. And I think the birthing day is so important and transformative and I'm glad that I was part of providing resources for that. But there's so much beyond that and parents really need support as they raise humans. I mean it's a big job, it's just huge and I'm also a parent which I think is important for the context of this conversation.So I have five teen and young adult children.
Kira: I hear a Dorian and I came to this work through the mental health field, so I kind of had the same feelings but the opposite side of them. So I was a childbirth educator as well, but all my work in mental health was really helping adults unpack what had happened to them in their Wildman. And when I started feeling, wouldn't it be amazing if we could help parents know what to do to prevent this, so that these people don't end up on my couch in the first place. So when Deana and I got together, that really is informed for both of us, you know, how do we help parents do right now? What's going to be best for their kids in the long run? Who's the adult we're aiming at, which is why our podcast is called raising adults and that's really the foundation of our future-focused parenting philosophy is start with the end in mind, who are we aiming at? Let's start there and that's going to help us make our best decisions right now.
So I am also parent coach. I do all the same fun stuff in the parenting world that Deana does and I'm a mom as well as she mentioned, I have twins who are 9.5 at the time of this recording and I figured out I am exactly halfway through my parenting journey because my kids, they're late birthdays and we held them back so they will leave the house at 19 and they are 9.5 this week.
Laura: You are saying this is something that we talk about a lot on this podcast that we want to parenthood that parents don't have to escape from and a childhood that Children don't have to recover from. I love this and we also talked a lot here on focusing on the long game, the long-term outcome that so much of parenting, mainstream parenting is focused on short term results, get compliance, obedience, get them to do what we want them to do. And rather than focusing on that long-term distance, that future person and relationship to the relationship that we want to cultivate with these beautiful humans that we are so blessed to get to raise.
Okay, so let's bring this conversation then into raising responsible adults. Like what does that mean to raise a responsible adult? I would love to know your takes. Like what do we think of when we're thinking of responsible adult?
Deana: Yeah. Well, Kyra touched on our philosophy and we think it provides a nice platform for that are kind of a jumping-off point. So when we're talking about looking at the end, start with the end in mind, then we have this really unique opportunity to lay a foundation for that. And so the way we like to think about what is a responsible adult look like, well, it looks like a person who is no longer reliant on us for those day to day tasks, for decision making, for critical thinking, for taking care of themselves out in the world.
So a good kind of picture of it was we like to think of a funnel and that as children grow, they move toward the wider part of the funnel, so they have increasing privileges, but also increasing responsibilities. And that's what we're kind of moving them toward when we're being a future-focused parent, it's hopefully working ourselves out of a job.
Kira: That's exactly it. You know, what does it mean to be an adult where you're on your own right? And have I raised my kids to know how to do that in a way where they're healthy, they're mentally well, they're emotionally, well, they're capable of being in good relationships, they can be self-sufficient. That groundwork happens all throughout the parenting journey and it's our responsibility as parents to set them up for that end game.
Laura: What does that look like in practice? That kind of along the waist? I've got little or kids. So I have an eight-year-old and an almost six-year-old, you know, we've got a teenage mom in the house here today and I know lots of my listeners have very little ones. They've got twos and threes. We talk a little bit about setting up this long game, this future focus looks like throughout the years.
Kira: Yes, please let's because littles is really the most wonderful time to start this and it's never too late. Like we always say you literally can't start this too late, but please start. But if you got that whole trajectory of parenthood ahead of you to set this up. And so Deana touched on it that idea of a funnel, right? So at the beginning we have limited responsibility and limited freedoms and privileges. And as those kids grow we give a little more responsibility. But in exchange for that, we get more privileges.
So an example of this in my home, my kids on their fourth birthday got four chores and every year they turn five we add a chore six, we add a chore. But we also add a privilege so that they're learning over time. Yes, I'm doing more and I'm taking on more responsibility but by showing my parent that I can handle that and that I can do what's necessary to work as a part of my team which is in my home, I am earning this freedom. I'm being trusted with this freedom and so they start to grow in responsibility and in freedom. And of course with that freedom comes some responsibility to write. If I say your bedtime is now 8 30 I need to trust that you're going to be respectful of that and go to bed at 8:30. Otherwise, we're going to probably have to lose that privilege.
But it's just a beautiful balance that as you can kind of hand more and more and gently over the years give a little more, give a little more. But also show them look as you take more responsibility, you get all this amazing freedom. It just blossoms and that's kind of how you play that long game.
Deana: Well I love this, I mean the tying responsibilities and privileges is something that we are big fans of and there are also kind of some practical ways that you can flex that responsibility muscle even with little kids. So I'll just share one of those that we like. It's just a little framework and it's called I do it, we do it, you do it. So a great little framework for maybe teaching a job around the house. Let's use making the bed as an example.
So I do it. The parent is going to first demonstrate how the job is done and we really encourage do it really the way you like it because we're really wanting to teach our children to do the job well and have that responsibility and own it not in a way that we have to come in and fix it later. So that I do it is the parent demonstrating the job and the job done well. Then we do it just like it sounds just peel the covers back off. Now we're going to do it together and you can do this even with a toddler, have them pull up the covers and tidy up the pillow and straighten things out and let them practice along with you. And then over time, you move to you do it with an older child, it could probably be right away okay your turn you make the bed so that you do it is handing that off to your child is a really helpful framework for things like chores or household tasks.
But we also encourage families to think about rehearsals and modeling and kind of practicing even with things that aren't task-related. So that could be things like decision making or how to conduct yourself at certain events, manners, things like that. We encourage talking with your kids. Okay, we're headed to this dinner and how are we going to behave? And so thinking about things like how to politely ask for things to be passed to you, how do you politely ask for the restroom? How do you interact with your host if maybe there's a food you're not fond of? Those are things that maybe aren't a task but there's still responsibility involved in being a polite guest.
So we are big fans of I do it, we do it, you do it for task-based things. It's a great little easy framework lets kids practice. But we also encourage those conversations about things that are less task-based and are more about decision making and critical thinking.
Laura: Yeah, I think you're touching on something that I think is really important. Being able to be really, really clear with our kids about what our expectations are, that gives us an opportunity to be really clear with ourselves. Are my expectations developmentally appropriate? So this is the first step of checking in with ourselves. Okay, so these are my expectations. Just a quick check. Is that reasonable to expect that the kids this age? Okay, so yes it is now, I'm going to clearly communicate it either through this conversation that you were just talking about or through the I do it part of that where I mean where you're modeling the expectation or you're giving them the opportunity to practice or to role-play.
I was just thinking about, I had an article that came out in better homes and gardens on how to know when your kid is ready to stay home alone and one of the things that I said in there was that they role-play different scenarios with you and if they think that that's silly, you know that they're not willing to do that, they think they're above that are too old for that, that kid's not ready for that responsibility. They're showing you that they're not ready to be a little bit vulnerable, to be a little bit silly to practice something that's a skill that they need to build, being able to be home alone.
I love that perspective that you are taking to this, that these are ongoing conversations, and part of its checking in and modeling the checking in process to teaching them how to be discerning members of the community that they're in. I love that, thank you for this.
Okay, so then I know that all the parents who are listening right now are thinking like, okay Deana uh that's great. Are you going to come over to my house when I've done that? I do it, we do it, you do it and they're still not making the bed like what do we do then? And so I would love to know a little bit about your perspective on that.
Kira: I think that there's a common misconception that if something doesn't work right away, we should throw it out instead of playing the long game. I mean like commitment until we're blue in the face, right? It's a game for long game. And this is really one of those things, what both of us can attest you having parented this way is that if you are consistent, if you keep setting that expectation and you are consistently saying, you know, this is how our house runs and it's just my expectation and you're linking it to their freedom, they're going to do it.
I know that sounds crazy when you're starting, you know little and you're like, I can't get my two-year-old do anything, you can, you actually can and it's that consistency over time, it's not gonna be perfect right away. It's going to take them a while to get used to this. But if you're patient and you're going slowly and you're choosing age-appropriate things over time, especially when they're little, if you think about little, they love to help, it's like their favorite thing in the world, and we sort of missed this opportunity because we're like, oh, you're so little, you can't help instead of going what if please help me? You know.
Laura: Who has helped me here, This is how you help.
Kira: Right and then part of that too is the way you honor your kids when you're seeing that they're helping and you're seeing that they're getting it right and we have an opportunity to say, I mean I tell my kids all the time, it is a common phrase in my house that was so responsible, thank you for making a responsible choice. And if they hear that over and over again, what I think I don't want to do, they're going to want to keep making responsible choices because they're being validated there being recognized for their role. We talk in our house all the time, we're a team, We call ourselves team Dorian Deana's family is TD- seven, like we have a name, we're a team.
So the few times that my kids have ever pushed back on chores, we just talk about, you know, we work as a team and that's just not up for debate. Like you're a part of this household, you benefit from all the privileges of living here. So I really need you to participate in helping our home run smoothly and show me that you can appreciate all the wonderful things that exist in this home by caring for it and boom, they go do their chores.
So when you're communicating in that loving way, acknowledging what they're bringing to the table, being grateful that they're bringing it to the table, and giving them freedom for it. It's pretty rare to have a kid pushback on that.
Deana: It's so true and take advantage of this time when they're young and they see the responsibility as a privilege. We were talking about the link between those two and how if an older child isn't and I can attest to this with scenes of an older child isn't meeting a responsibility. We can link it to maybe pulling back on a privilege. But what's so special about those younger years and why we love when lay this foundation is that often they see the responsibility as a privilege. It's what Kira was talking about. They love to help or they feel like it makes them such a big kid to have this job. That's all there's and so really capitalizing on that is so helpful. And then you find that they've learned also take some pride in what they're doing around the house and they're less likely to resist it later. As those, those jobs increase.
Kira: My kids literally don't remember a time when they didn't have household responsibility. It's just always been. Yeah.
Laura: Yeah. I don't know if this is true in your experience, but in mine, most kids want to help out. They want to feel like an important contributing member of a family. They want to feel like a part of the team, They want to have that sense of, you know, in this family, we help each other out in this family, we have each other's back in this family. We work together. They like that family culture and I think so often with little ones too, we almost train helpfulness out of them. They are so naturally helpful. No one is more helpful than a two-year-old whose mom is sweeping the floor like they want to get in there. They've got their little toy broom like there's ways to support that invite that in and without praise over the top praise. There's a difference between praise and encouragement and sincere gratitude and also without consequences or punishments. You know,
Kira: You know, I think like that idea that a responsibility can be a privilege. Like one of the favorite stories we tell on the show sometimes is the year I asked my kids what would you like your privilege to be this year? Because I always get their input and they said can we be in charge of our own snack? You want your privilege to be that I work less. Yes, yes, you may know, but for that it was this huge thing. I get to be in charge. I don't have to ask permission or ask for what I want, I go, I get my snack, I help myself in your leg. Okay great. You know? Yeah, that link is really important.
Laura: Kira, can you dip in there just for a minute? I feel very strongly that our kids are our partners in our family, that they are teams, and that as much as possible we should be collaborative with them. And so I love to hear that you're asking them, what do you want your privilege to be? Can you talk like is their collaboration in this process that you have with your kiddos?
Kira: Definitely. And with almost everything we do and I know Deana said this with her kids too, we always say both of us, I really value your input, your opinion matters to me. I'm going to make the final decision but what you have to say is an important factor. In fact, we just talked about this with our kids because my district is supposed to go back to school on April 19th. I was like, you know, your dad are going to make this decision, but this affects you. I want to hear what you say.
Your opinion really matters to me and this contributes to them feeling so seen and heard. And this is the other beautiful thing that I didn't really get to say earlier, but was on my mind, is this idea that when you're building this trust, like I give you responsibility, you show me you can do it, I gave you this freedom. That relationship that you talked about at the start, it makes it stronger and better. You just have a beautiful relationship because you're in collaboration together and kids have such a strong desire to belong, they want to belong. And so when we give them a team and we give them a role, it increases that sense of belonging. When we value their input and asked for their opinions on things, it increases their sense of belonging.
Deana: You know, if I could just piggyback on that, as for those of you who have little ones, this is a little sneak peek into the future. The dividends of this are huge because when you're inviting your Children to weigh in on decisions that you might have coming down the pipeline or family issues, whatever it might be, they are going to be then far more likely to come to you with their big stuff when they're older because they know, wow what I have to say in this family matters and they've even sought out my opinion and my input it seems like, you know what, my parents are pretty safe place and so then they're going to choose you to go to when things are hard or when they face a challenge.
And so setting the groundwork for that kind of really safe emotional relationship pays off so much I can tell you having olders were so glad that we did say, what do you think about this? Because now they choose to talk to us and I really want to give that message because I think those younger years when you're in the thick of it, it's so hard and you can't see out the other side. But to be able to encourage people to say, wow, this is really worth it. And the relationship that you build can be really beautiful. And then the teen years don't have to be that thing that we're all afraid of, like, oh I have to white knuckle it through the teen years and I'm gonna have this sullen person who doesn't talk to me, it doesn't have to look like that at all. It can be really beautiful.
Kira: Well and I think there's another piece here. I'm so glad you said that data, because what happens is when we seek their input. I can't tell you the number of times that my kids have actually presented me with information that made me change my mind. You're right, thank you for sharing that with me. I was not thinking about that or whatever. Then I changed my mind. What does my child learn? They learned that my critical thinking skills are working because I brought them to my parents, my parents changed their mind. And if we're talking about raising responsible adults right then, as they get into adulthood, they trust their critical thinking skills. They trust themselves because they've seen that their voice matters and that they're capable of thinking in a way that can actually influence their life and so they're much more likely to feel confident making those decisions as they get older.
Laura: Or are you advocating for themselves?
Deana: Yeah, if you can have impact in a family, then you can have impact in your community and in your workplace, and in your friendships.
Laura: It's so beautiful and it's so important to know what Kira just described is not permissiveness. I think parents are so afraid of being permissive that they go the other way and are rigid. It's being flexible and flexibility is something that is a beautiful skill to have. Being able to be flexible, change your mind, and modeling that for your kids is a gift to them.
Kira: But the boundary that never changes right. The difference between permissive flexible is the boundary that never changes is I make the decision. I'm the grown I’m the parent, that's the boundary. I'm going to actually make this decision. But where there's flexibility is I value what you bring to the table to help me understand what's going to be best for you. So that's not permissive. Permissive is I'm going to let you decide.
Laura: Although you're pushing back here, you could have it. Yeah.
Kira: Right. Exactly. And those are not the same thing. We talk a lot about like strong boundaries and then inside of that so much room for feeling, thoughts, and discussion and all the things that combo pack is a way to walk this line.
Laura: Okay. And so then what are some of the common pitfalls that parents kind of fall into when it comes to raising responsible adults?
Deana: Yeah, there's a lot to watch out for. I mean we want to raise responsible adults, but there's ways that we can help foster that and things that parents do need to watch out for. So one is we want to encourage parents to kind of avoid this tendency to only point out the problems like, oh, when you made the bed, the comforter was like, oh, caddy want us instead of what he hinted at and mentioned a little bit ago is praising them when they do get it right. So instead of falling in that pitfall, we've come out on the side of positive reinforcement.
Let's catch our kids when they are demonstrating responsibility. Like she said pointing it out even using that vocabulary, thank you for making that responsible choice because that's something that can be a little bit tricky as we're encouraging responsibility sometimes parents will then just see where they're still following short which is easy to do especially when they're little and still just trying to figure it out. So we don't want to only capitalize on like oh I'm pointing out when you get it wrong, positive reinforcement, catch him getting it right.
I think another place we can kind of fall into the ditch on either end. And a great example of this again would be household responsibilities is, Laura you even mentioned this to thinking about the age-appropriate and frame-appropriate expectations. So a pitfall is giving out too much responsibility too soon. Where there truly not capable of meeting that expectation or performing that task or whatever it might be. You don't ask your four-year-old to clean the bathroom till it's spotless. It's not gonna work out for anybody. They're going to be frustrated and you're just gonna have to do it over.
But on the other side, this one has a pitfall on the other side too. We do encourage parents, give out those responsibilities, let them flex that muscle, let them try it out. If you're, all you have to do is tidy up your room and your 17. Maybe we need to take a look at that. You could have a lot more responsibility and we've maybe aired on the side of not challenging our kids to step in and be part of helping the household run smoothly.
And then the last one that I'll mention, and Kira may want to piggyback from here, but inconsistency is a big pitfall. She mentioned that tendency like I tried it and it didn't work and you just kind of want to bail and this is about that long-range thinking and so when we're helping our kids be responsible and take, take ownership, whether it's a little job around the house, like emptying a bathroom trash can all the way to big things like critical thinking about, should I go to this party when they're older, wherever that is, if we have the ability to be persevering and stay consistent with inviting that input, talking through decisions, clearly stating our expectations, like you mentioned Laura that's going to pay off much more than the, I'm just throwing noodles at the wall and hoping one of them sticks. So I think inconsistency as another pitfall we have to watch for. I tried giving them that job. It didn't work out, so forget it. I'm going to go in and rescue them again. So that's another thing we can watch for.
Laura: I think it keeps coming back to this, but this long game piece of it is so important that it is so instantaneous gratification is quick results. We want that at times because that's where humans and that's how our brains work, right? Everyone that quick, dopamine surge, that's not how it works with raising kids, right? And these things that you're talking about, they are more effortful. The effort is put in on the front end and the dividends are paid out later. You know, it's a longer-term investment.
Kira: I was even surprised despite having this philosophy. I was surprised by how quickly I saw those dividends. I mean really by the time my kids were four or five, I was like worth it, totally worth it. Um you know, so I think, I think those, those toddler years, I often say when we're public speaking, like when you're at the, you're in the thick of it in those years, like that is that is the time when you're like, I've said this 1000 times and I have to say it again. But if you can power through that with that long game, you will be surprised how quickly the benefits start, and once you start to get a little bit of those benefits and you're like, oh, it's working, it's working. It empowers you to keep going for the rest of your parenting journey.
Deana: because it's hard when you feel like that broken record Like I've said this over and over and you still don't get it. But it is so true. I mean what's still game-changing about parenting with this future-focused mindset is when you're thinking about what you want that grown up to look like that adult you're aiming at it is game-changing to help you make a better decision right now. It isn't what you were talking about the top of the episode Laura about just wanting to kind of fix the behavior instead, we're more willing to engage with it, lean in, do the shaping hard work because we know what that looks like on an adult and it helps us really make a decision that's best rather than the one that's easy. And I think that's really powerful.
Laura: I think so too, so powerful. So one of my big values as a parent in our family is that we want our family to feel like we are a team and that we will help each other out. And so when I take an approach to choices might be a little bit different than what you teach and that's totally okay. We don't all have to do it the same, but when my kids express that one of the things that are their responsibilities in the house are hard for them or that they're not up for it right now. We always figure out a way for them to get the support that they need in that moment that will help them. So like one of the small things that kids in our house do early on is to take their plate over after meals to the dishwasher. I can't tell you the number of times where they've said, oh mommy, I'm tired, can you do it for me at dinner? And I said. Yes, honey. I'm always here to help you. I'm so happy to help you.
The very first time my... So let's see how old were my girls? And this happened. They were six and four. The very first time. The little one was always so helpful. Never resisted anything. Always happily took her plate. But the first time she said, no mommy, I'm not going to her. Big sister looked over at her and said, Evie, it's hard for you today. I'll take your plate and just took her plate over for her. They do. They learn through modeling And that took that was three years of concerted effort because my oldest is very strong-willed and can be very resistant at times. And it's just beautiful. Like this is the long game, right? This is what we're looking for. We're looking for kids who know what it's like to feel responsible, who knows what it's like to feel like they are important members of a family and you want to keep that feeling.
Oh, well, thank you so much for this conversation. This is so fun to chat with you. I'm sure my listeners are going to want to check out your podcast. Why don't you tell us give us a rundown of your social media and where they can find you. Everything will be in the show notes. But sometimes people like to hear it out loud too.
Kira: Sure and we actually have a freebie for your listeners, help them raise their responsible adults. I'll just talk about the freebie and then Deana, you can share all the social media goodness. So if you go to bit.ly/raisingadultspodcast, we have a calendar of character traits and so it is a 12-month. It's not like an actual calendar. It's more like 12 months of information where each month we take a different character trait, like emotional intelligence, wisdom, kindness and we give you all this stuff we give you like activities you can do with your kid to foster that character. We give you books, you can read that, teach about that character trait, the definition, what are ways you can model it, what are the questions you should be asking yourselves as parents. It's just packed. So it's 12 different character traits and a video called three essential strategies for raising adults.
And it signs you up to our newsletter, which is, you know, with most newsletters, you get a couple of follow-ups. One of the follow-ups actually is all about chores and has a downloadable freebie that's age-appropriate chores. Yeah.
Deana: And if your listeners want to just learn more about us and what we do as parents coaches. Our website is futurefocusedparenting.com. We always emphasize its past tense focused E D, futurefocusedparenting.com. And we're on both Facebook and Instagram our handle is @futurefocusedparenting. And then, of course, our podcast, we'd love to invite your audience to give it a listen if they'd like, it's called raising adults and you can listen right on our website but we're also on all major podcast platforms.
Laura: Awesome. Well, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and your experiences here with us. I really appreciated it. It was really fun to chat with you here, lots of fun to talk to.
Kira: Oh thanks so much for having us.
Deana: Thanks. It was a blast.
Okay, so thanks for listening today. Remember to subscribe to the podcast and if it was helpful, leave me a review that really helps others find the podcast and join us in this really important work of creating a parenthood that we don't have to escape from and creating a childhood for our kids that they don't have to recover from.
And if you're listening, grab a screenshot and tag me on Instagram so that I can give you a shout out um and definitely go follow me on Instagram. I'm @laurafroyenphd. That's where you can get behind the scenes. Look at what balanced, conscious parenting looks like in action with my family and plus I share a lot of other, really great resources there too.
All right. That's it for me today. I hope that you keep taking really good care of your kids and your family and each other and most importantly of yourself. And just to remember, balance is a verb and you're already doing it. You've got this.